engulfed.

Results Day

2007-03-03T12:36:00.000+08:00

10.00am: Woke up from my slumber and finally felt the butterflies in my tummy. Said to myself in hokkien (yes yes i am an uncouth person afterall) "jit bai siao liao" (transla;tion: this time gone already). Though I tried to make myself as tired as I can the night before, I slept fitfully and woke up earlier than I wished to.

10.15 - 11.45pm: Played Heroes V for the whole time, while trying to surpress the butterflies within.

1 pm: Met up with some of my classmates, namely ht, s, hy (ky), jo and hc. It was the first time I see S not having any appetite. She couldn't even finish a plate of char kwey tiao, which was chicken's feet for her last time. The feeling's rather weird though. Your mind's telling yourself to keep calm while your hands are icy cold. Bleahs.

Well, I did better than I expected myself to do. But I wasn't really happy. No, not because of my grades, but as one of the few people who got their grades first, I was able to turn into an observer of the situation. So many scenes of elated cheers, tears and shouts that are interrupted by tears of sadness, of disappointment, faces of worry and discomfort. Maybe thats why my mood didn't really rocket sky high in the first place. But ahh. We should all agree that this day is the end of a chapter and the start of a new one in our lives. Like I've been telling people (it may sound hypocritical, but its very true if you think about it), the A levels cert is just to get you through the doors of a uni. It doesn't matter what the grades are as long as you can get your butt in there. Afterwhich, everything's restarted and everyone starts on a clean slate all over again. Haha, which is not very encouraging since some of us worked our assess off for the past 2 years and now we have to start working it off again (at least for the girls).

Movies, Movies and more Movies

2007-02-25T22:12:00.000+08:00

Been watching quite a few movies for the past few weeks. So maybe I'd talk a little bit about them and some updates of my reamaining life before NS.

Ghost Rider (starring Nicholas Cage and, in my opinion, a rather hot Eva Mendes =p)
Nice CG effects, good looking babe, cheesy storyline. Another flopped Marvel comic-to-movie port that failed, just like Elecktra and Daredevil. I still can't believe how he finished off 3 our of the 4 enemies by killing each of them within 2 minutes. =.=" And Nicholas Cage honestly doesn't really fit the bill of a jaded rider.

Protege (starring Andy Lau, Wu Yan Zu)
Straightfoward, nothing exceptionally difficult to understand like the storyline from One Last Dance. A look into the proliferate drug trade, especially in Hong Kong. The show kinda attempts to let us take another look into the sinister world of the "get-highs". Andy Lau (the druglord) places the blame onto the buyers instead of the sellers. You know, the usual "without demand, supply ceases to exist" argument. Wu Yan Zu (the undercover) also tries to come to terms with why people actually consume drugs. A conclusion that is rather disturbing: 人因为空虚而吸毒，所以到底是吸毒恐怖，还是空虚比较恐怖？A good show really, albeit some disturbing scenes. =)

Just follow Law (starring Fann Wong, Gurmit Singh)
Another of Jack Neo's movie. Not that I'm bias, but his movies always start out hilarious but lacks a climax and ends impotently. Commendable effort from Fann Wong though. Jack Neo was wise to employ her services at a high price (or so I heard). She was willing to do all the disgusting but really funny acts in the movie. She became a guy in a girl's body after switching souls with Gurmit. Picking her nose, spewing vulgarities, scratching her groin, showing off her panties (of course we can't see la), molesting herself... Really funny. Haha but film quickly reveals itself as a budget movie with a cheesy moralistic ending when the acting of Fann fades away.

Notes on a Scandal (starring Judi Dench, Cate Blancett)
Entered the cinema expecting to fall asleep halfway, thinking that it's some British show that will lull me to sleep. Superb acting from both of the female leads, especially Judi Dench, as an over-possessive mastermind/narrator. Shall not reveal too much about the show, but the superb acting of the female leads really make the movie exciting, and somewhat disturbing.

Heh. Life's been pretty much the same these days... Meeting up with friends, working, sleeping, trying to get less fat. Haha. Guess the whole world's really scared of the impending A levels results. I always keep quiet whenever people talk about it. Not that I'm complacent, but ever since the end of A levels last November, I forced myself to avoid thinking about the results. So much so that I don't have any nightmares that my classmates and colleagues talk about. Even my mom thinks I don't give a damn about it. Haha. I guess I buried those thoughts from myself a little too well.

...

2007-02-15T13:44:00.000+08:00

when 'sorry' doesn't mean a thing anymore...
the sinking feeling even though you're ostensibly on cloud nine. ironic, isn't it?

Birthday! :)

2007-02-06T22:04:00.000+08:00

Heh, yes yes. The owner of this blog has already turned 19 and counting... Plagued with OT at work for the rest of the week, so maybe I'll let photos do most of the talking =) It has been at least a decade since I last visited the Underwater world. Yea, since my kindergarten days. I must say that the place hasn't really changed much in terms of design. Heh. It has a really large interaction pool now though. With not just starfishes to touch, but also archer fish and stingrays! Haha, one of the naughty ones attempted to take a bite off her. =p Kinda hilarious, the way she reacted to the "aggressive" stingray.

That's Nemo! Or Mou-zai, in her words. Better mention that it's a clown fish too. In case someone scolds me for stripping it from its scientific name. There was this auntie next to us that proclaimed proudly that she "scolded a little girl for calling the clown fish Nemo". Please la. Give the child a break.

The Regal Blue Tang or more popularly known as DORY! Haha. I like its colour combination of black and bright blue. =D

Japanese Giant Spider Crab. Yea, really acts like a spider. Decided to take this picture as it was scaling the ceiling of the aquarium upside-down! Cool eh. But looks quite scary up front cos of its huge size.

Just some little candy of information, sharks cannot stay afloat if they stop swimming. No choice but to carry on in the wild. But in the underwater world, you see sharks resting on the top of the tunnel. Took this cos it looks really scary with that mouth and "eyes" of his.

Tiny jellyfish! They look really cute when they bobble around in the water. Haha, and somehow they swim with their heads down. Maybe their heads too heavy already =p

That's Gracie the Dugong! Haha, looks kinda gluttonish hor? For the 3 rounds we rode around the tunnel, this huge white flubber had been busy eating. It's mouth acts like a vacuum so its really quite cute la. The eyes like two dots on a white background. Those kind of doodles we draw when we're bored.

Heh. Made this at ECP with tealight candles. In essence, it was a really unforgettable birthday spent. Well wishes from people whom I lost contact with long ago, great company through the night... If you're reading this, though you claimed that one of your presents was unpresentable, while the other is shared, never once was I disappointed. Like I said, just simply seeing you put in so much effort to let me enjoy this little trip out is really an invaluable gift from you to me. It may not seem much, it may seem as if it's poorly planned, but I was the most of all, moved by your sincerity. Yea. I want this to carry on forever... yet - Bah. Don't want to pen my stupid pessimistic thoughts on this happy entry. I'll just have to keep on wishing. (: Happy birthday to me and everyone else in this world.

Food for thought
A quote from a precious gift =)
' One night, a man dreamed that he was walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints. Then, he noticed at the lowest times of his life, there was only a single set.
"Lord, you said that if I followed you you'd walk with me all the way. But during troubled times, there's only one set of footprints"
The Lord replied, "My son, I love you and would never leave you. During the times of suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.." '

Some emotion that's keeping me awake

2007-01-30T01:07:00.000+08:00

Yea, it's 1.06 in the morning. Half the world's asleep, and I'm supposed to be too, considering that I have to wake up at 7 am for work later. Yet, an emotion deep inside my heart is keeping me awake. Just watched I Not Stupid 2 for the first time, and yea. It is indeed a touching show. Made me feel really lonely all of a sudden. Perhaps it is the intermittent gusts of winds that are blowing into the room through the windows, coupled with the silence, save the rustling of leaves outside. Perhaps it's the situation that i'm tangled in... Like a never-ending skein of cotton wound round a reel, waiting for someone to untangle it...

I can't help but to think about it when I'm lying awake on my bed...

The sky and the sea

2007-01-28T22:34:00.000+08:00

Been really close to nature for e past two weeks! haha. feeling like a little kid all over again. Firstly it was bubbles at ngee ann city. and for these two weeks, building sandcastles and flying a kite! haha believe it or not, this is our first time flying a kite. Heh. An important lesson learnt from it is that, never believe that more expensive kites are easier to fly/ can fly higher. Heh. Our $15, supposedly reusable kite only managed 10 minutes of flying time before being cut off by a stupid $3.50 pikachu kite that some uncle was flying. And the kite drifted in the skies for a bit before, we presume, landing onto the roof of zhen fa seafood buffet restaurant.

Heh, our $3.50 hello kitty kite fared much better. Stayed high up in the skies for 4 whole hours while we just lazed and rolled around on the grass like muddy pigs :P Although we were flying a kite for the first time, we managed to fly it higher than the rest of the little boys and girls, and experienced uncles and aunties. Haha, maybe only we goondos will do such a thing when the wind is so uncontrollably strong, and risk losing our beloved kite totally if the string snaps. Hehe.

Hmm, yea. These little jaunts with her on weekends really keep me alive through the work-week. Makes everything seem so much more bearable when you have something or someone to look forward to :)

My colleagues are supposed to offer an answer to our supervisor, on whether they want to extend their work contract with the company. Well, they did seem undecided last Friday, and the interim response seemed rather negative. Hmm, yea, it has been really fun working with all of them. We got something to laugh about everyday. Guess I'll miss them no matter whether they stay or not.

spinning: 好朋友 artist: 罗志祥

像两首节拍不同的歌
却又同时被爱情合奏
旋律勉强着
愉快不能够假装快乐
你心中有宽阔的天空
空气还稀薄
曾经等待因为会改变什么
你总会属于我
但是最后时间证明了
你只喜欢我
你说我比较像你的好朋友
只是不小心拥抱着
你道歉你难过
于是我给你笑容
谁在乎我的心还会不会寂寞
如果爱情是五线谱
我只希望用全音符
吟唱出爱上你
那完整的幸福
当你的心没有耳朵
即使我为你唱着歌
你也只看见我哭了
你说我比较像你的好朋友
只是不小心拥抱着
你道歉你难过
于是我给你笑容
谁在乎我的心还会不会寂寞

曾经因为等待会改变什么
你总会属于我
但是最后时间证明了
你只喜欢我
你说我比较像你的好朋友
只是不小心拥抱着
你道歉你难过
于是我给你笑容
谁在乎我的心
ho 还会不会寂寞
你说我是你最好的朋友
却不应该再拥抱着
你退缩你冷漠
于是我放开双手
不在乎我的心
会永远的寂寞
呜..

Life's like that

2007-01-18T22:47:00.000+08:00

This week's been passing REALLY damn slowly. Especially today man. All of us were staring at our PC's clock, waiting for some force that can make the numbers change faster. Yea, but survived it anyhow. Though the work that we're involved in is really boring, my colleagues make it so much more endurable. I'm not someone who expresses his gratitude towards others freely (makes it more valuable if I only say it once in a while), but yea, since our contracts are about to be terminated in about a month's time or less, here goes. Many thanks to:-

The manly (happy) dudes:
1. Desmond - the LEADER of the pack who has been suffering from chicken pox, causing me to kena the job of being I/C for the past week - missing in action from office for a total of FOUR days (and counting)
2. Alex - the ah bengish, hamster looking shuai-ge in the office! no, we're not cunning people, are we? =p

The womanly *pukes* babes *pukes again*:
1. Clarice - the intensely vertically and horizontally challenged penguin who likes to crow... i mean sing Jay's songs
2. Cynthia - the drama freak who loves to see models fall down on You-tube. She's the first girl i've seen who types like the wind on the keyboard
3. Mayleng - someone whom u can never tread on her toes when she has a mood swing or she'll fine you $1000 regardless whether the government approves it or not. PS: for the 312479546834th time, i spilled ONLY WATER on your bag! Maybe some saliva, but nahh, that's not important. =d
4. Michelle - the #2 victim of a supposedly jinxed toilet bowl in the female toilet. *plomp!* Likes to enslave me with tonnes of faxes that she's lazy to fax for herself =p Just joking.
5. Xin Yu - the #1 victim of the dreaded toilet bowl. Heh. Likes to watch Bleach just like me :) She likes to go around asking for $10 from everyone who requires a favour from her.

Went to the Bishan stadium gym with Tony today. Finally gotten my butt to move around abit more. Felt that i grew a few balls of muscles today =p Hehe. It feels much better to be running, pumping weights instead of nua-ing on the office chair, trudging through countless surveys and eating super oily and unhealthy things for lunch.

Life in IDA is ending soon. Considering whether I should ask for an extension beyond the current project since the distance from home and the proximity to town is kinda to my liking, even though the work isn't really appealing. Life in NS' gonna start on the 27th April. Things changing nonstop and all. The things and people I look forward to seeing and doing now may very well be different in the near future. I guess that's your reason for not wanting to begin something that may reach an ending well before we intend for it to be. It's human to be tempted, human to want someone better in your life. Be it looks, character, ability to connect with one another's inner thoughts. Yea. You'll have plenty of such people coming after you, people who can offer so much more to your life..

4 more weeks before the future consumes the present and everything it stands for. For now, I just know that I love u. I really do.

-----

Spinning: Somewhere only we know
Artist: Keane

I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete

Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches of it looking at me
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?

Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?

[break]

Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

So if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
So why don't we go

This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?

Great day! :)

2007-01-13T23:42:00.000+08:00

Woke up at 7am in the morning to have breakfast with my parents at Geylang. Hunted manymany places for a shop which sells liquid soap bubbles. Yea, I thought it'd be pretty easy to find, but they're practically extinct these days (or extinct when you find the urge to buy them). Searched through Bras Brasah, parts of Geylang and Marine Parade, finally finding what I was looking for at the latter :)

Watched One Last Dance or 茶舞 at PS. This one supposedly won/got into Cannes Film Festival as one of the participating films. However, I'd rather stick to simpler movies like Happy Feet if all of them were just as unfathomable as this one. Sure, the cinematography was pretty well done, the atmosphere of the film was commendable as there's no way you could have imagined that Singapore as a setting can be filmed in such a way after watching all too many local dramas. Most of the cast were familiar faces from Mediacorp. Find that their acting was as good as those from HK :). Bleah, but the way the storyline was presented was too abstract and confusing. Was pretty sure that I wasn't the only one who felt that way cos when the movie ended, there were many loud "huh?!"s amongst the audience. Well, I may change my mind once someone explains the subtext or rearranges everything into a linear plot for me. Haha...

Strolled all the way to Orchard Road and sat at the fountain outside Ngee Ann City to... blow bubbles! Wahaha. It may seem childish or embarrassing with the never-ending stream of passers-by, but it's really fun. The kids who passed by with their parents were so fascinated by those floating globes that they had to stop, cheer and play for v long. Haha. Even the parents stopped on their tracks to watch their innocent children chase the bubbles around. Really put a smile on hers and my face.

Their parents had a hard time coaxing them to leave though. We even had to stop blowing and hide the bottles in order for them to leave successfully. =) But yea, really fun to share the joy! Hehe.

What's up

2007-01-10T20:48:00.000+08:00

Guess I haven't really been updating these days. Yeap, life's been pretty much the same, revolving around work, friends and sleep (or the lack of). Met Alan, Andrew, Ah Ma, Derek and Francis for dinner ystd. The first 3 As are just about to lose their hair this weekend, so I guess we had to give them a lil' farewell dinner. Haha. Guess I'm gonna miss them quite a bit. We don't meet up much, but it has always been fun. Hopefully all these won't change after NS :)

Oh yea, FINALLY gotten my enlistment date - Apr 27. A little later than the rest of the April batch since I'm gg into PES C, which has a shorter training period. (Can practically hear the PES A/Bs cursing me =p. Break a leg, people. Break a leg.)

What lies beyond Saturday is inconceivable. Making sense of the unspoken truth.

fuck it.

2007-01-02T00:07:00.001+08:00

我像个残废
飞不出你的世界
借不到一点安慰
为什么你拼命后退
退到了边界
结果我没了知觉
就连痛都嫌浪费
在爱里残废
非弄得伤痕累累
累到我无力再追
最怕你突然要挽回
回到了原点
原点却又像终点
然后多痛一遍

I rarely taint my blog with vulgarities. but yeap. fuck it man.
Achieved my aim of not spilling any tears in 2006. Perhaps I will pay it all back on the 1st day of 2007.

Happy New Year

2007-01-01T20:33:00.000+08:00

2007... It's the year whenI am forced into the adulthood:

1) GST is jacked up to 7%
2) My student pass charges adult fare
3) CPF is officially deducted from my pay

From these 3 observations, everything's getting more expensive for me, and I bring home lesser money cos of CPF. Great. Really need to cut down on my expenses since I don't think my mom would be giving me any more pocket money for as long as I work.

Really thought I would usher in the new year at home as everyone seemed to already have some sort of a date with everyone else, except me :(. Well then, Tony asked me out for pool at the last minute. So I went to meet him, thinking that I'd be home before 10, play some comp games and all. Haha, but nope. I didn't make it back the whole night. Stella and Wenting popped up practically out of nowhere to join us.

Heh, so off we went for pool and arcade. The usual stuff happened, was lousy at pool, couldn't play bishi bashi properly for my lousi-ness in matching colours. =p. But still it was really fun la. Haha. Only game I could play properly was the boxing one, where the objective of it was to just punch the stomach of this thing as hard as you can. Haha. The machine labelled me as "downtown hero" or "hard puncher" or summat like that. :D

Zhimin joined us for dinner. For some reason, she refused to pick up her phone. So we combed half of Plaza Singapura just to look for her. In the end, we found her at Carrefour, buying cups. Haha. I realise I do have abit of a cheekopek mind.

S: "PS where got sell non-disposable cups..."
Me: "got... 内衣店 lor"
S: "We talking about cups leh....."
S: "*shocked and laughs*.... you cheekopek lor"

Wahaha. oops. 被发现 le. Didn't really feel like going home, so me, Zhimin, Stella and Wenting went to TPY Kbox to crow! Really quite stressful when you go out late at night with 3 other girls. Gotta make sure they don't run into any sort of trouble with anybody. Hope I did a good job body-guarding them. At least they went home the next morning in one piece. :) Price for overnight Kbox yesterday was really steep. Gotta pay around $37 per person. Ouch man. But we didn't really have anywhere to go, so can't complain. Haha. Sang quite a bit yesterday la. Even the fast songs. Stella practically went mad in Kbox. Started to jump around on the sofa, sing scream shout laugh throw things at me. -.-" But yea, it was really a fun way to go into 2007 without squeezing with the whole world. :))

PS: 请你相信我。。。

明天过后

2006-12-28T09:45:00.000+08:00

作词:吴克群作曲:吴克群
你问我明天过后会如何
世界若毁灭我们又怎么了
我笑了电影情节太唬人
只有单纯的你相信着
你问我明天过后会如何
冰天雪地里我们怎么活着
我笑了笑你太傻又太笨
但自己心中却决定了

我相信抱着
你的手就温暖了
睡着或醒着
我的手为你加温
就算明天崩塌又如何
我们手握着
外面天再冷
全都由我负责

tunnel talk

2006-12-20T01:07:00.000+08:00

Well, they always say that there's light at the end of the tunnel. I can't say that I'm nihilistic, and hold a pessimistic view on life and all. Yet, whenever I think that I see light at the end of my tunnel and happily walk towards it, I just find a puddle of glowing shit more often than not.

For me, shit awaits me at the end of it all. Maybe it's the same this time round.

My life in IDA

2006-12-12T23:47:00.000+08:00

Heh, I guess work's been causing me to put blogging at the back of my mind, but decided to update a little before I go to bed. Seeing the lights of day and night through my 11th storey window seat, which is really pretty good in my opinion. Shall take a picture of it soon and post it up. Get to see the whole of ECP from my seat. Heh.

My mornings include jaunts to the office, through the Citylink Mall as well as half of Suntec City before reaching my office at Tower 3. Dno, but I guess I really do look forward to these slow walks in the morning, seeing people cheong-ing past me whilst holding a styrofoam cup of coffee, or a Today paper in their armpits. Guess I'm not suited for the rush-life, at least not yet. I still yearn seeing things go at a slower pace, or rather, at my own pace. Boring as it may seem, but yea, lazing around somewhere nice is my kind of life. Haha.

Can't really disclose my job scope due to the Official Secrets Act, but it basically involves getting into arguments with Managing Directors of 12 000 companies in Singapore. Somehow they find it simpler, and less time consuming to formulate, and present unreasonable demands to exempt themselves from compulsory government surveys, some doing it while spewing vulgarities all over the place, and harrassing poor temps like us for 5 straight hours when they could have finished the surveys in 15 minutes -.-"

Ah well, guess it's all in a day's job? Haha, working OT this week to get more money so that I can play more! :) But yea, really quite tiring fun nonetheless cos my colleagues are all nice people. heh. Though it kinda makes me look forward to the end of every week though. Weekends and breaks are hard to come by nowadays...

The earth and the sky, two elements which never mingle... can they be brought together?

bleah

2006-12-09T00:16:00.000+08:00

bad days at work, stress, responsibilities...

Comparatively, I was in dream heaven the other 2 days. Not just work, but other things. It's making me think that this is nothing more than a dream that has transcended the boundaries of reality... Maybe it's time to go back to where it belongs. Sigh.

So why can't you be there to reassure me when I'm in doubt of myself.

work work

2006-12-06T09:33:00.000+08:00

haha, started work at IDA since the last Monday, nice environment, and nice scenery atop the 11th floor of Suntec Tower 3. Haha. At work now so i'll update more at home :) ciao~

PS: 29/11/2006 - i'll never forget this day of my life

Prom shopping

2006-11-28T19:45:00.000+08:00

Hehheh, feeling really tired now though its just around 8pm. Been out the whole day shopping for prom stuff, or rather, shopping for Hui Ting and Jessline's prom stuff while i bought mine within 20 minutes -.-". Bugis Village is really big! But majority of the stores are catered for girls. But tt's the place to go if you wanna shop for prom. Saw quite a few Ajcians there too. Haha, guess everyone's preparing for the Dec 6th. Hopefully it'd be fun. Must borrow camera from someone to take pictures.

Shopped and walked around PARCO for their makeup stuff. Bleah. Legs aching like mad by the time i reached the MRT. But nonetheless, decided to play ball after that. Damn cute la, i made a new friend today! His name is Rachel (yes he's a he), 2 - 3 years old. He ran (squeak, squeak, squeak) into the middle of the court and just held my hand. And dragged me about to play with him! Just like that! Gahh. Haha, if kids were always so adorable (without the tantrums, the poo and the sickness), then i think they're nice to have. Haha. But the joy is also to put up with his/her tantrums, poo and sickness with the one you love. Heh. Getting delirious already. Talking about such things.

Oh yea, Burger King seems to have downgraded itself to Burger Queen. Gone are the ultra-big TUBS (I call them tubs because they are really big) of drinks you get when you upsize. Instead, they downgraded the cup sizes (sounds wrong but nevermind...). So you get the regular when you upsize, and you get the small (the kids' meal size) if you don't. Blah. I still liked those tubs.

post-exams!

2006-11-26T22:29:00.000+08:00

yeaa, it finally ended. Been playing so much that i haven't had the energy to blog (or even think about it). Watched Step Up after my Lit paper on Thursday. It's damn good la. haha the dance moves and Jenna Dewan are HOT. damnit. haha. For those who haven't watched it yet, I suggest you catch it before it ends. Had dinner at Pepper Lunch. Though the serving was pretty small, but it was quite fun to be able to "cook" your own steak. Yummy, and it tastes good too! :)

Friday was cool... Went to school for basketball with Xavier and gang, then met Ms Quek and my class for outing. Went arcade to play! Haha, I like the strength game the best cos thats one of the few games I can beat people at it besides Daytona. Haha... Jessline is Arcade Queen man. Completed Bishi Bashi with one token, and trashed Ms Quek at Puzzle Fighter. Then we had dinner at Seoul Garden and celebrated Ms Quek's birthday. The Marina Square Seoul has a wider selection of food! Haha somehow we had a communication breakdown and we ended up with 2 cakes. So I paid for one of them myself, which is okay la, since Ms Quek did so much for all of us anyway. :) Intended to head to her friend's cafe, but those arcade crazy people dragged us back to arcade AGAIN. Went about playing the games with some of the girls, while the rest sat on the stools for girl-talk (eww).

Yea, hope the remainder of my holidays are just as fun :) Gotta find a job soon though, dno if my relief teaching application will get through...

the clock is ticking...

2006-11-01T03:21:00.000+08:00

Less than 24 hours to go before the big one kicks in. Gotta say time really flies. It really does. To all my friends taking the 'A' level examinations 2006 this year, good luck. This is it. The starting line. Lane 4's ma' favourite and ain't nobody gotta stop me from finishing this.

Here goes nothing.
Guess this place will be the home of cobwebs, spiders and cockroaches for a month. Anything but new posts for now.

PS: 夜深人静时总会不禁想起一些不快乐的事...

Elitism...

2006-10-30T21:56:00.000+08:00

Well, in case you haven't seen the original, controversial post of our dearest AMK Man-In-White's daughter, Ms. Wee Shu Min, here it is:

*******

mom's friend sent her some blog post by some bleeding stupid 40-year old singaporean called derek wee (WHY do all the idiots have my surname why?!) whining about how singapore is such an insecure place, how old ppl (ie, 40 and above) fear for their jobs, how the pool of foreign "talent" (dismissively chucked between inverted commas) is really a tsunami that will consume us all (no actually he didn't say that, he probably said Fouren Talern Bery Bad.), how the reason why no one wants kids is that they're a liability in this world of fragile ricebowls, how the government really needs to save us from inevitable doom but they aren't because they are stick-shoved-up-ass elites who have no idea how the world works, yadayadayadayada.
i am inclined - too much, perhaps - to dismiss such people as crackpots. stupid crackpots. the sadder class. too often singaporeans - both the neighborhood poor and the red-taloned socialites - kid themselves into believing that our society, like most others, is compartmentalized by breeding. ridiculous. we are a tyranny of the capable and the clever, and the only other class is the complement.

sad derek attracted more than 50 comments praising him for his poignant views, joining him in a chorus of complaints that climax at the accusation of lack of press freedom because his all-too-true views had been rejected by the straits times forum. while i tend to gripe about how we only have one functioning newspaper too, i think the main reason for its lack of publication was that his incensed diatribe was written in pathetic little scraps that passed off as sentences, with poor spelling and no grammar.
derek, derek, derek darling, how can you expect to have an iron ricebowl or a solid future if you cannot spell?

if you're not good enough, life will kick you in the balls. that's just how things go. there's no point in lambasting the government for making our society one that is, i quote, "far too survival of fittest". it's the same everywhere. yes discrimination exists, and it is sad, but most of the time if people would prefer hiring other people over you, it's because they're better. it's so sad when people like old derek lament the kind of world that singapore will be if we make it so uncertain. go be friggin communist, if uncertainty of success offends you so much - you will certainly be poor and miserable. unless you are an arm-twisting commie bully, which, given your whiny middle-class undereducated penchant, i doubt.

then again, it's easy for me to say. my future isn't certain but i guess right now it's a lot brighter than most people's. derek will read this and brand me as an 18-year old elite, one of the sinners who will inherit the country and run his stock to the gutter. go ahead. the world is about winners and losers. it's only sad when people who could be winners are marginalised and oppressed. is dear derek starving? has dear derek been denied an education? has dear derek been forced into child prostitution? has dear derek had his clan massacred by the government?

i should think not. dear derek is one of many wretched, undermotivated, overassuming leeches in our country, and in this world. one of those who would prefer to be unemployed and wax lyrical about how his myriad talents are being abandoned for the foreigner's, instead of earning a decent, stable living as a sales assistant. it's not even about being a road sweeper. these shitbags don't want anything without "manager" and a name card.

please, get out of my elite uncaring face.

****

I'll even throw in a complimentary picture of our dear girl:

http://shim1.shutterfly.com/procgserv/47b5cc38b3127cce98548604babd00000027108AZM2rNy5Ztw

well. big boobs, big mole, pea brain.

Psalms 23 ver. 2.0

2006-10-23T00:08:00.000+08:00

psalms 23

The Lord is my shepherd, i shall not fear;

He makes me lie down in green pastures

He lead me beside still waters

He restores my soul.

He guides me in the path of righteousness for His name's sake.

Even though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death;

I shall fear no evil,

For You are with me.

Your rod, Your staff they comfort me.

You make me sit down and eat in the presence of my enemies;

You annoit my head with oil,

My cup overflows.

Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,

and i will dwell in the house of the Lord forever

Amen

GP dept's parody

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not flunk;

He keepeth me from lying down when I should be studying.

He leadeth me beside the water cooler for study break;

He restoreth my faith in study guides.

He leads me to better study habits for my grades' sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of borderline grades,

I will not have a nervous breakdown

for Thou art with me.

My prayers and my friends, they comfort me.

Thou givest me answers in my moments of blankness;

Thou anointest my head with understanding.

My test paper runneth over with questions I recognize.

Surely passing grades and flying colors shall follow me all the days of my examinations,

and I shall not have to dwell in this misery forever.

...Amen. :)

I Wanna Grow Old With You

2006-10-17T19:45:00.000+08:00

Grow Old With You
Performed by Adam Sandler
on the Wedding Singer Soundtrack

Pilot (Speaking): Good afternoon everyone. We're flying at 26,000 feet, moving
up to thirty thousand feet, and then we've got clear skies
all the way to Las Vegas, and right now we're bringin you some in-flight
entertainment. One of our first-class passengers has written a song
inspired by one of our coach passenger, and since we let our first-class
passengers do pretty much whatever they want, here he is.

Adam Sandler (Singing):
I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
All I wanna do is grow old with you

I'll get your medicine when your tummy aches
Build you a fire if the furnace breaks
Oh it could be so nice, growing old with you

I'll miss you
Kiss you
Give you my coat when you are cold

Need you
Feed you
Even let ya hold the remote control

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
Put you to bed if you've had too much to drink
I could be the man who grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you

bored?

2006-10-17T02:40:00.000+08:00

That's what my brother does when he's bored. Disturbing me with his doodles on MSN chat window... -.-"

Last day of school (part 2)

2006-10-13T21:35:00.000+08:00

Eh. Nice hor? I continued to strike one more time on the 7th. Though the strike on the 4th rack was due to a technical glitch. only the 4th la! the rest all NOT FLUKE can.... Grrr.

Rasyida and... judging from the pudgy body, Selina's turn to put the ball into the hole. Fun.

Must proudly proclaim that GERRY took this damn seh picture of Chingyi bowling. She gotta thank me man. Not easy to capture motion shots. =P

Helpless laughter when all my pins are on the right but the ball rolls into the gutter on the left. Plus, Selina in the foreground. Concentration!

LAST DAY OF SCHOOL (part 1)

2006-10-13T21:28:00.000+08:00

Rasyida and I!

Getting back results slips have never been so demoralising. Haha. Now I understand why they say I look disgusting when I try to act cute. Now I really do :P

Majulah Singapura! Haha. Attempting to show how "tall" Chingyi is and how "short" I am.

end of school

2006-10-13T01:11:00.000+08:00

(EXTREMELY LONG POST ALERT)

today's the last day of official lessons for the J2s. Unlike the many who got a chance to sit on the bus and reflect on what they felt for the school, i wasn't really thinking so much. At least until i saw those blog entries, which set me thinking...

Life in AJ wasn't a bed of roses, especially when you're a reject from a supposedly more vibrant school. I still can remember vividly when I first stepped into AJ with Chiong Wei. I was totally devastated at the state of the school. Everything was so much.... deader than Temasek. The people, the building... Wah. It was so bad that I felt like crying. Haha. Yea. And the entire orientation period was spent trying to get out of school to appeal back to TJ, and heck, I even tried my luck in MJ. It was torturous to have to quarrel with Lim Kim Thye, Ms Winnie Tan and then Mrs Tay in order to get out of school, and then having my appeals rejected again and again. My sister was right in telling me to be prepared to spend the next 2 years in this college despite my appeal to MJ. Yeap. Non Mihi Solum. As I heard this school song for the first time, I remember asking myself how the hell did i land myself into this mess.

Another bomb dropped when it was time for class allocation. Great. A whole class of girls except me. Not like it was much of a difference from the 27-2 combi i had in Temasek, but it just didn't feel comfortable, as usual. Even up till today, I kinda envy the classes with a significant percentage of guys, where they can just get together and play basketball/soccer. Well, at least I have 38/05 to do that. Yea. Great bunch man. A pity that I only got closer to them from this year on. But yeap, in came a second male member in class, HC. At least it makes it all more bearable, and awfully funny with his funny ethics.

I started to get to know the school better. Felt that I was generally more comfortable here than in TJ, as AJ's environment is more of a Chinese-speaking one. The angmoh-ness of my TJ class was so daunting. I know I can't converse THAT well in English, even though I can write pretty alright. So yeap, the frequent chinese, occassional hokkien (e.g. kknbccb) environment proved to be right for me.

On to the teachers. Had a great bunch of teachers, especially during my J1 days. Most of the teachers in AJ are friendly. Or should I say, teachers in the Arts department.

Had Ms Quek for Econs/PD J1, Ms Williams for Shakespeare/PD J2, Mr Lee for J1 GP, Mr Seng/Loh and Ms Ng for History, and lastly, Mr Guru for the other lit papers. (certain individuals are intentionally omitted in case I swear at them or something)

Ms Quek ... undeniably the most patient, the nicest teacher I've ever met. (one with nice butt, not according to me but the girls in class. I AM NOT A PERV) Damn, I still remember the Swensens treat she gave us. Must have burnt a hole in her pocket. I guess she's the teacher I'll miss the most once I leave college. She's a friend and a mentor to all of us. And she likes to pair her clothes and scrunchy with the same colour. Which makes her look like a certain kind of fruit sometimes. Pink guava/Grape as the most prominent ones. The one whom the class holds the fondest memories with. Especially the time where we gave her a big box of individually written gifts for her birthday, and the time that all but 2 people turned up for school and the rest got called back for a "scolding" session.

Ms Williams... Often temperamental, but still undeniably capable at Shakespeare and solving problematic issues in this ill-disciplined class. When she's in a cheery mood, she's often nice to joke with. Although I'm irked by her vacillating mood sometimes, but I guess that keeps us in check more often than not. And kept us GENERALLY out of trouble. Haha. She looks the romantic type, but is absolutely practical. Shall get her an oven timer or a spatula or a notebook for teachers' day next time.

Mr Lee... The inspirational. Wow. He's THE man, man. Absolutely fun to joke with (heh heh. fun to extort a Crystal Jade dinner out of him for the Delta peeps. Next target: $33 Pariss buffet at Marina Square) and gets down to business when he's at work. He's definitely unbeatable in General Knowledge, from the poorest country in the continent of Africa to Freudian principles, he knows them all. Not kidding. And he's absolutely funny too. Thanks for all the quiet advices that you gave me. Quiet cos' I can't fathom what he says without saying "Pardon?" after every sentence.

Mr Seng/Loh... The partners for History, with absolutely contrasting characters/ behaviours/ pronunciation. Mr Seng proNUNces English with an awful British accent (and a Donald Duck voice) and has a great ego for his knowledge in Southeast Asian history. But beyond that, he's an absolutely hardworking teacher. Especially this year, could see he toned down a lot over the holidays, and has become one of the best teachers I've met. Mr Loh has a really good command of English both written and spoken, albeit too soothing for lectures. Better for Class 95 midnight shows. It lulls you to sleep immediately. Ultra friendly though, and you can talk about Starcraft with him too. Haha.

Ms Ng... Our pregnant (now not) communist who owns the Little Red Book written by Mao. Nice to poke fun at. Extremely funny to receive her sarcastic remarks on our dumb questions. Still can remember the times when she hasn't given baby Samantha her name, and we were attempting to psycho her to giving it different weird names.

Mr Guru... the TURBANator. Not an attempt to be racist, but he's undeniably cool. Owns a harley davison and dark visors, as well as a soccer jersey numbered 3.1412. Though we do kinda blame him for some of our weaker papers, I still like his witty remarks whenever we say or do something stupid. Jessline thinks that he spends his day just thinking about witty things to poke fun of instead of preparing for our papers. Haha. No comments on that.

Well, thats it for the teachers. Back to the school days. It really wasn't easy to survive in 40, nor was it that difficult. Though I can't thank them for the suannings every single day, they made me grow up in an unexpected manner. It's the subtle things that you grow up from that 40/05 has brought into me. I do regret that I was unable, as a class leader or a member of the class, bring everyone together. Fragmented (and slack) as we are, I still do enjoy the moments in class, especially when HC and Jessline are together in a common space. They create a ton of fun and laughter, even when we're ploughing through the most boring questions of Economics or History. Then there's the canteen gang, which comprises me, HC, Jessline and Yiling. Standard routine of eatting, then watching Yiling and HC quarrel over the most mundane of matters. Haha. Yea, it was fun.

The non-history girls... Selina, Hui Ting, Huiyi, Ong Hui, Chingyi etc etc. For being there to suan/scold/let me make fun of. Especially during study periods after school. Yea, at least they made me feel that I still have company when I had a lack of friends during the 1st year in school.

The Delta people... nuff' said, some have become my closest friends. Kelvin, Tony, Wenting, Stella (and Zhimin, though she doesn't belong in this group), Xavier, Shannon... These few whom I still keep in close contact with after Delta Exp. Mr. Lee (again), Mr. Tan, who believed in me so so much.

God, as I'm typing this, I realise I have so much to lose in my supposedly "lousy" AJ life... The As is the next large hurdle, and please let me clear it with ease. I've never regretted switching from Trip-sci double math to pure Arts without maths. Not a single bit, and please don't let me regret this decision coming March... It wasn't a life that I had expected out of JC life, and yet it wasn't one which I regret. Though I don't buy the Non Mihi Solum motto, nor the school leadership's conservative attitude (better now since Ms. Leong took reign), but I do miss the living things that breathe life into this very lifeless compound. The people that matter in my heart, I pray for you all. Amen.

2006-10-09T21:51:00.000+08:00

So you think you can dance?

Haha. If you think you can dance (hint: Selina), think again.

yawn

2006-10-04T23:12:00.000+08:00

you care too much about how others think. be less mindful and enjoy. :)

Yea. Lesson learnt from sleeping over issues.

Sitting,Waiting,Wishing

2006-09-30T15:12:00.000+08:00

Now I was sitting waiting wishing
That you believed in superstitions
Then maybe you'd see the signs
But Lord knows that this world is cruel
And I ain't the Lord, no I'm just a fool
Learning loving somebody don't make them love you

Must I always be waiting waiting on you?
Must I always be playing playing your fool?

I sing ya songs I dance a dance
I gave ya friends all a chance
Putting up with them wasn't worth never having you
And maybe you been through this before
But its my first time
So please ignore
The next few lines cause they're directed at you

I cant always be waiting waiting on you
I cant always be playing playing your fool
I keep playing your part
But its not my scene
Wont this plot not twist?
I've had enough mystery.
Keep building me up, then shooting me down
Well im already down
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting

Well if I was in your position
Id put down all my ammunition
I'd wondered why'd it taken me so long
But Lord knows that I'm not you
And If I was I wouldn't be so cruel
Cause waiting on love ain't so easy to do

Must I always be waiting waiting on you?
Must I always be playing playing your fool?
No I can't always be waiting waiting on you
I can't always be playing playing your fool, fool

They say you reap what you sow...

2006-09-26T22:40:00.000+08:00

That's not true. At least not for me, in so many aspects of my life.

Wouldn't it be nice if this world is simpler?
Sitting, waiting, wishing.

you can't blame them...

2006-09-21T22:18:00.000+08:00

they're human afterall. Who? The Presidents of the United States of America. Look at this doodle by John F. Kennedy. Lets us into what's in his mind:

Which is... (from top, clockwise)

1. NATO - North Atlantic Treaty Organisation. The one they tried to defend Europe from USSR... I think.
2. US' permanent enemy, Fidel Castro - who lives a VERY long and ripe life albeit the various assassination attempts. The Presidents were so desperate that they even (allegedly) attempted exploding cigars and the like. Well, he's outlived 9 US presidents already. I think it's 9.
3. Castro's homeland, Cuba - "Blockade Cuba", which obviously refers to the Cuban Missle Crisis which almost destroyed half the planet with nuclear dust.
4. Castro again, this time in a rectancle. Maybe to put him in jail or summat like that.
5. A yacht, an eraser, and checkers. Maybe he loves to sail in his free time, play checkers, and kuti-kuti. U know. the eraser game.

It seemed like he doodled a "9-11", wrote "conspiracy" and underlined it. Wow. He predicted 40 years ahead...

Pretty cool eh?

bastard on my locker

2006-09-19T19:14:00.000+08:00

OH started to notice our locker was unlocked half the time, so we decided to change the lock combi around a month ago. Didn't change it too much. Just a digit difference. The next day, I found it unlocked again with a note saying

"Don't act smart and change your locker combi, because I know. I am a ghost". Or summat' along that line. Since it looked pretty much like my OTHER lockermate, HC's tzee cha (fried noodle) handwriting, OH and I thought he was just trying to be lame cos we forgot to inform him about the change.

Well, just yesterday, OH complained our locker was unlocked again. So I decided to ask J for her spare one. The next morning, I recived a phone call from my friend, T:

(7 am - I slept at 5 mugging for the afternoon's paper btw)
"Hello?"
"Eh, your locker got 2 locks leh. Then on the 2nd lock got a note saying "You better give me your code number, if not I will not remove this lock. Code: _______ "
"Which bastard is this?!"

Was so angry and sleepy so I fired an sms to OH and HC on my bed with vulgarities attached, asking them who the hell offended anyone @$#%#.. 7 early 8 early come and prank me like that. Judging from the tone, it'd be legitimate if I'm the one using HIS locker. but NO. I OWN the locker for God's sake. At least until farewell assembly.

That damn bastard had the cheek to put such a message on my locker. The process of removing it was pretty funny. Got Rahul to get the pliers ... or whatever you call that. Just the super big metal scissors to kiap the lock away. I mean, thats utterly childish for a guy to spend money to get a lock, just to lock me out of MY locker when he knows plain well that I could just get the Student's Council to kiap away the lock. -.-".

So what's left of the locker now, is ONE nice lock, and a cardboard piece pasted on my locker front:
"HC here. Got balls come and find me. Don't act xia lan"
J was thinking of putting HC's number on the piece of cardboard but decided against it. In case he posts it on some sex channel or sumthing.

Blah. Got us so pek cek even when we reached the MRT station. It was fun to vent all your post-exam stress on that bastard though. Looking forward to his reply. Shouldn't have thrown his love letters away man.

Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol

2006-09-17T00:07:00.000+08:00

We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

2006-09-16T03:09:00.000+08:00

If a pen is mightier than a sword, then words are more devastating than a nuclear payload.

Another sensitive issue triggered, nope, not by grandiloquent cartoons, but a sentence by Pope Benedict. Its aim to condemn the use of religious violence is ironically reacted with violence. Oh well. A lesson to the world that you gotta THINK before speaking. (Our very own local version came in the form of a nonsensical and comedic order of "mee siam mai hum")

Two more exam-days for the lucky me. Yawn. CMPB wants me back for a medical re-examination. Dno what's additionally wrong about my body... Thursday. Dang. Why can't it be on an exam day or something. :(

No more

2006-09-10T02:34:00.000+08:00

No more second guessing... I'd take whatever that comes my way as it is... (:

1 more day to Prelims. At least let me pass everything la...

Monday - 1 GP essay, 6 Econs essays
Tuesday - 4 History essays, 3 Lit essays
Wednesday - 3 Lit essays
Monday - 3 Lit essays
Tuesday - 4 History essays

Damn it. I need more pens man. Think my wrist's gonna cramp up halfway. What a subject combination. =/

musings at 3.38 am

2006-09-08T03:43:00.000+08:00

Made someone's life worse off than it can already be, unwittingly. Guess I was blinded for a moment and swerved out of the kerb. To you, I sincerely apologise. Please don't hate yourself because I feel no hurt either. It wasn't easy for two individuals to hit it off so well that quickly, so I really really would not like to lose a friend in you. :)

Been gaining back my motivation to blog, for some reason. Maybe I'd be willing to embark on any activity. Anything besides studying. Impossible for me to finish anything by Monday. Guess this prelims will be a gauge of how ill-prepared I am for the As. Advance apologies to anyone who may be affected by my soon-to-be devastating results. Though I promised not to give it up. So i'm trying. Honest :)

attempting to find in motion what was lost in space.

2006-09-06T23:46:00.000+08:00

"I didn't go to the moon, I went much further - for time is the longest distance between two places... attempting to find in motion what was lost in space... The cities swept about me like dead leaves, leaves that were brightly coloured but torn away from the branches. I would have stopped, but I was pursued by something. It always came upon me unawares, taking me altogether by surprise. Perhaps it was only a piece of transparent glass. Perhaps I am walking along a street at night, in some strange city before I have found companions. I pass the lighted window of a shop where perfume is sold. The window is filled with pieces of coloured glass, tiny transparent bottles in delicate colours, like bits of a shattered rainbow..." ~Tom, the Glass Menagerie

A fragile, yet beautiful piece of writing, won't you agree? :)

awake at 2.24am

2006-09-06T02:29:00.001+08:00

Heh. Spent the day playing basketball with Shannon, Tony, Qi Xiang, Stella, Wenting and her friend. Think her name's Zhimin. Haha. Quite fun to play for fun la. Serious games are just too serious sometimes. Yummy bak chor mee opp. YCK CC. Mee pok, dry, mai hiam (or with hiam) at $3! Add loo-les also don't have to add money. Hehheh. But the kuku boss gave Stella's mai hiam noodles the extra portion instead of my one! :( boo. Bias. Haha.

Bought lunch for Von, and went back to school with full intent to study. Ended up playing bball for 5 whole hours. Haha. This is called succumbing to peer pressure. Tony tempt me, i tempt Shannon and Qi Xiang, then Shannon tempted Wenting, Wenting tempted the other two girls. Wahaha. But yea. Like I said, it was fun.

Played till we practically couldn't see anymore. Some of us had night blindness (like yours truly) and couldn't even see where the ball was going. I could only make out moving white shirts and nothing else. Yeap. Shannon, Wenting and me went for Sumo House at AMK. Haha. I like japanese curry udon. But not the one at Sumo House (AMK). Okay la, let's face it. How good does budget jap food taste anyway. Though I think the Bedok main branch still tastes pretty good :)

Yeap. So that sort of sums up my day. 5 days left to prelims and i'm still liddat. Haha. But i'm aiming for the As. =) Wish me and everyone else luck.

just a post to show that i'm still alive

2006-09-02T01:06:00.001+08:00

i'm still alive! give me two more weeks to post the next post la. haha.

Prelims are coming, though i'm 100% sure i would not finish even 3/4 of what I have to study. so many things to memorise and my brain is just too slow to do it quickly. So i shall just take my time :) Wish me luck

PS: is it dead already?

Tired. Really

2006-08-18T23:25:00.000+08:00

Been a tiring week. Barely scraped it through with almost 17 hours of studying everyday... Studying, and facing failure in it. Haven't been rewarded with the emotional support that I've been looking for. Yet i'm in dire need for it.

Breaking down...
真的累了. in more than a single aspect.

Brian McKnight - 6, 8, 12

2006-08-09T20:31:00.000+08:00

Ooh, ooh
Do you ever think about me?
Do you ever cry yourself to sleep? In the middle of the night when you're awake,
Are you calling out for me?
Do you ever reminisce?
I can't believe I'm acting like this
I know it's crazy
How I still can feel your kiss

[1] - It's been six months, eight days, twelve hours
Since you went away
I miss you so much and I don't know what to say
I should be over you
I should know better but it's just not the case
It's been six months, eight days, twelve hours
Since you went away

Do you ever ask about me?
Do your friends still tell you what to do?
Every time the phone rings,
Do you wish it was me calling you?
Do you still feel the same?
Or has time put out the flame?
I miss you
Is everything okay?

[Repeat 1]

It's hard enough just passing the time
When I can't seem to get you off my mind
And where is the good in goodbye?
Tell me why, tell me why

[Repeat 1]

Sing it for me
Ooh, ooh

Thoughts from a funeral

2006-08-06T20:04:00.000+08:00

Hmm. How does it feel when we cease to ''function'' anymore?

My neighbour/mom's friend's dad, just passed away yesterday at the age of 90+. He didn't seem like a nonagenarian. Used to wake up earlier than me, seen to comfortably seated at our nearby kopitiam just when my dad sends me to the MRT station at 6.30 am. Much like clockwork... until now.

I guess I can't spot him sitting at the kopitiam, waiting for the shopowner to roll up his shutters anymore. Putting myself in his shoes, how does it feel, to be counting down to the number of days you have left until you leave this world? That every day which you wake up successfully may be your last? How does it feel, when the day finally comes, when you don't open your eyes no more, and you cease to ''function''. Is it a relief? That you're given a chance to finally lie down and rest after almost a century long of toil, albeit an eternal one?
I guess I can never find out until I'm in that situation.

musings in the middle of the night

2006-07-31T01:16:00.000+08:00

this is the time when the whole world is deep in slumber, and i'm just in the mood to blog a paragraph or two.

Uncle Alex and Bro coaxed me out of the idea of taking a Business degree in future due to it being overtly generalised. "Specialisation"'s the key or so they say. Great, just when I've got a plan on where and what I wanna do in future. Of course, they do make sense... I just didn't like the idea of unsettling myself in thinking what I want all over again. If I were to stick to their suggestions, it would either be Arts & Social Science or Law. Not feeling that great about either courses since I'm not one who is particularly gifted in the art of memory.

Looking forward to National Day cos I'll be going down to Kallang Stadium to watch fireworks bloom in the skies! Hmm. Is it the event itself or the company that I'm looking forward to? I guess it's a culmination of both factors! Really hope that we'll enjoy ourselves =)

Uncle Alex treated us to some Samba brazilian restaurant near Big Splash. The foods pretty worth it since it's a buffet of neverending meat and more meat. Haha. However, by the time you reach the 5th or 6th type of meat that the chef slices for you, you would most probably have lost any sense of enjoyment to the thing you're chewing at. The only mission is to clear all the meat that is piling up rather quickly on your platter. Haha. But still, for meat-lovers or the bottomless pits (hint: Selina), do go there and have a try. Albeit their cheap prices for food, their drinks are charged at exhorbitant rates. They do not serve plain water, so... a bottle of Naive, i mean Evian (around 600ml) is priced at $6! Spent $36 just on fountain water. Man... They have nice egg mayonaise though. And all kinds of meat, barbecued in different styles. Got char siew even. It's kinda funny to hear those foreign chefs trying to pronounce char siew. =P. Service's pretty good though they really have over-zealous waiters.

Oh yea, sugar coated, roasted pineapples as dessert. Damn nice to eat if I wasn't that bloated to enjoy it properly :)

PS: Sorry for the bad grammar and stuff. My mind's feeling pretty incongruent and incoherent tonight. Ciao~

confused

2006-07-24T00:25:00.000+08:00

tryin' ta seperate the realistic and the etheral. argh. i give up. i'm a sucker at such things.

Thoughtful

2006-07-21T22:21:00.000+08:00

Just in the mood for some reflection, since it's the end of the week and all.

This week really did trudge along unwittingly i guess. Never did the days pass as slowly as this (and I have a premonition that it's going to get worse as the Prelims and A levels loom). Never had I worked so hard in my entire AJ life, attempting to complete all the homework piled on me. Not just me, but others in class too. Guess it's really quite nice to see a fragmented class come together, not for a glorious cause, but still something worthy to comment about.

I have a soft spot for nice things. Who doesn't, anyway. But I guess mine is in the form of nice scenery! Beaches, Nightscape, anything that'll shut my mouth up and just make me melt myself into the environment, and think of things. So, yea... Guess i'll drag someone along with me to watch the fireworks bloom in the night sky during National Day :)

My room's becoming an insectarium already. Blame it on me lah, sneaking in food every night. There was a mass of ants on my computer table just now, swarming around my mug of root beer. Then there was this beetle that was flying around and I liberated it by flinging it out of the window. Now there's supposedly a baby moth, and I just saw 2 mozzies zooming past me. Hurhur. Nope, I don't live in a tropical jungle, thank you very much. But I'm just very lam nua (think tare panda and it's laziness)... so I always leave remnants of food around. Surprisingly there're no cockroaches. Don't really like 小强s that much. I really need someone in my life to cure me of my "organised-mess" character trait. Q said that she's most probably worse, but I bet mine's pretty bad too :P. humpf.

PS: I wish that you meant everything you said and more...

Dinner!

2006-07-18T14:46:00.000+08:00

Is there a bird or summat like that?

The all girls photo

Us, normal, Shannon, not.

Another shot

And another.

With Mr. Lee outside Crystal Jade! The food was delicious! Haha.

Feeling happy, Mr. Lee?

Big tummys and big contented smiles.

Nothing to do... Food haven't come yet.

Still waiting for y

Ordering food. Damnit. I shall not attempt to take orders again. Counted wrongly and ordered an extra bowl of wanton noodles which I had to wolf down singlehandedly. The noodle portions are VERY big, mind you. Everyone stared in disbelief as I finished both bowls! Faster than S sommore :D Oh yea, and I continued stuffing myself with xiao long baos and guo ties as if nothing has happened =P

Taking a long time to decide what they want, just as usual...

It was fun.. Really! Haha... Just had to endure alot of scandals as Shannon and co. kept poking fun at me. Mr. Lee also caught on and asked me who I actually like. Blahh. Big bullies. It was fun to see e intstructors again, though only around half managed to make it. Quite fortunate la, Crystal Jade has small tables. We were squeezing uncomfortably on a small table that couldn't even hold all our food at the same time. Thanks to Mr. Lee for footing the bill and apologies if I seemed to have coerced you into it. I'm a nice person. Really!

PS: It's fun to eat without having to worry about the buldging bill later.

I want to blog, but I don't have a topic to blog on

2006-07-17T20:35:00.000+08:00

How about...

...that I had loads of fun eating TWO bowls of la mian and loads of xiao long bao at Crystal Jade La Mian Xiao Long Bao?

...that extra lessons are clogging up my Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, making me reach home at 7 pm everytime?

...that my plan to go on a diet was thwarted by a Pizza Hut trip today

...that I saw, not one, but a whole pack (?) of seagulls on my way home, flying in a ''V'' formation? Mighty ducks, they say. =P

...that I was so tempted to go on a cycle at ECP with my new bike despite reaching home feeling super tired?

...that I wish to work hard for the coming days?

...bah. How about. I'll blog another day? =)
Sounds good enough.
I'll blog another day.

Just a post...

2006-07-16T16:22:00.000+08:00

...to say that I HAVE A NEW BLOGSKIN! wahaha. looks childish but i don't care.

Going for Delta dinner later with Mr. Lee and the Delta gang! haha. Hopefully it'll be as fun as usual! :D Ciao~

Sprained neck

2006-07-09T23:48:00.000+08:00

Woke up with a sprained right neck on a Sunday morning (afternoon). A bad omen for the coming week? Heh. Not sure. I don't know, but I always try to go for the stars when there are trees around waiting patiently for me to embrace. That has been happening since... Primary school? Gerry just never learns, does he.

Don't know what the heck i'm talking about? It's okay. I doubt anyone understands. A seriously random blabber here at 11.48 pm.

World cup finals later. Deciding whether to watch it or not. *yawns*

PS: staring at the unlit screen of my mobile phone.

beaching!

2006-07-07T22:12:00.000+08:00

(sipping Ribena as he types) Wah. Nice hor. Been sometime since I last visited ECP even though I live so near as some blardy effing b****** stole my bike. It was really nice to drop by and pay her a visit again. Whenever I sit by a jetty or breakwater, she never fails to bring out the sense of serenity and thoughtfulness within me. Images start to run through my head like a (more vernacularly put than a freight train) MRT train. Of course, on memories incurred on this very beach, happy and heartwrenching ones... Memories of my family, of friends, of relationships (more failed than successful ones), of so many unintelligible things. Whoever's by your side isn't all that important at that moment, as the crashing of the waves occupy your head and extradicates the heaviness within. Then, after being enthralled by the lapping waves for so long, you turn to people around you, and appreciate them better :)

PS: I won't give up! hopefully i'm right this time.

Cityscape...

2006-07-04T20:26:00.000+08:00

Love the atmosphere of the Esplanade at night. Puts you in a talkative yet peaceful mood. =)

update

2006-07-02T12:45:00.000+08:00

hmm. nothing much to update about, except the fact that I've been enjoying the end of CT as if it's the end of A levels. Been going out till late every single day... Haha. And eating alot alot alot too! Carl's Jnr, Kenny Rogers, Swensens, the usual fast food, you name it. =)

This world cup is damn weird la. Look at the teams being sent off. Blahhh. =/

Studying Day!

2006-06-23T19:03:00.000+08:00

Since I couldn't concentrate at home, decided to get some friends for a get-together studying session. Wasn't THAT successful, but at least it took out the boredom of studying. Couldn't really concentrate as I only had 3 hours of sleep prior to the studying trip. Nope, not coz of soccer this time... Just pure insomnia on my part. Guess my biological clock has shifted to Munich time. Hehheh.

A rare but beautiful sight from my room, after a sleepless night.

Wenting's calculator. Haven't seen one of these counting machines for ages. Reminds me that I gotta find mine for the Econs CT.

Studying...

Sleeping/Studying...

Yada Yada #6541354

2006-06-22T00:22:00.000+08:00

Random blabberings don't deserve any titles. And yet I havta think of a title to fill in everytime I blog. Just don't really like seeing a (no subject) as my entry header. I just realised that I have to blog in silence. My thoughts just don't flow as freely when I have some music on.

Hmm. Today's my first day stepping onto a basketball court since after Delta camp. Haven't exercised for almost 3 weeks. Not to mention the food that I've been eating. Carbo and fats loaded. Shot some hoops and played with some NSman who asked to join in. Now I feel like an ah pek, coz my back is aching like crazy. Haha.

Was just chatting with F online yesterday night. Well, he said that he's thinking of going overseas to pursue a media course. Said that Singapore is just too small. Well, that did set me thinking. What kind of a person am I? And what kind of life do I want to lead in the near and not-so-near future? Challenging? High in risk, yet lucrative? Or just a menial office job at some corner of Shenton Way? I'm not exactly a person who loves adventure, preferring to live in a live full of fun and danger... And yet, not someone who will just settle for some office job. Erm right. I guess up till now, my mind hasn't thought of leaving my comfort zone to pursue and overseas degree. I'm not ready, in the monetary and the mental sense. Not just yet. Not ready to land myself in debt before I start to work, not ready to, like what F said, leave everything behind...

Q said that I have really only 2 places to go since I'm without maths. Econs is out of the question as they have an entire maths paper to study for and it'd be suicide to register for that course. That leaves Arts and Social Science, as well as Business. Well, between a mugging course and one that seems so much more realistic and applicable to real life, I've made a mental choice for the latter. That'd at least motivate me for the A levels since I finally have a goal on what I want to do next time. At least, before I change my mind about it again...

PS: Is it real? Or just another facade? Hmm..

supposed to be studying

2006-06-16T21:34:00.000+08:00

Well well, supposed to start my revision for Econs after dinner. The time now is 9:32 pm and I've yet to start. Hehe. And oh, I'm still blogging. Just to update that life has been a pool of stagnant water after Delta Experience. Filled with, erm. Computer games, food, sleep and an occassional outing or two.

Celebrated Alan's birthday the other day with a meal at Cafe Cartel and a movie - Cars. It's damn good. Honest. Kept me happy throughout the show even though it made me $9.50 poorer.
Hmm what else.

Oh yea, CMPB check up. Temporarily in PES D and I got half my feet in PES C2L2 already. The PES D status was to see if I needed further downgrading. Had childhood cyclical neutropenia (Neutropenia refers to an abnormally low number of neutrophils, a type of white blood cell) and the Camp MO felt that I needed further analysis from SGH. Sooo... wasted my entire morning waiting in SGH, got my arm poked, waited some more... For what ya say? For the doctor to write that I've fully recovered and am hereby discharged from the illness. -.-" 5 friggin' hours just for that. Ah well, at least my mummy's happy that I've fully recovered (not as if she didn't know already before this checkup).

Humph. Tomorrow's Delta outing but some people wanna stay home to mug. Makes me nervous just thinking why I'm getting all excited about it when everyone else's busy mugging their asses off. Heh, which reminds me, back to Econs. Ciao~

delta instructors

2006-06-13T00:19:00.000+08:00

Well, just some formal introductions to the instructors of Delta experience, since I just got this photo from my friend.

From left:

(1st row): Wenting, Aini, Evon, Stella, Serene, Pei Gin, Olivia, Pei Qi, Kristine

(2nd row): Andrew, Karn, Yi long, Yong Sen, Shannon, Kelvin, Yong Wei, Xavier, me and Tony

what is it that i'm feeling?

2006-06-07T22:21:00.000+08:00

Uber confused at the moment. Should I take the plunge? It wasn't easy recovering from the previous trauma, and yet... Should I? Hmm.

Delta Experience

2006-06-04T15:04:00.000+08:00

This is my second time typing this post since Internet Explorer froze on me the first time round. The camp can really be summed up by this simple (or rather, thought-provoking) quote:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

Delta Experience came and went. The friendships forged, the memories cast into our minds, impossible to replicate, to recreate. The 19 instructors worked interdependently, almost beautifully, to run a camp for 100 people. The memories of these 6 days just stay in the mind, the feelings unintelligible. You just can't bring yourself to describe the camp with words like "happy", "enjoyable", "good" or whatsoever. To the 19 of us, it was so so so much more...

Special thanks goes out to, of course, Mr. Larry Lee and Mr. Tan Chin Kah, and not forgetting the unsung heroine, Ms. Maggie Quek. :) I love them! wahahaha. Thanks to Mr. Lee for his campers-nagging sessions to help us stall time, especially when we were peeing in our pants while trying to get the logistics ready for night games. Thanks for Mr. Tan for saying that he has alot to learn from me , which is totally not true. Thanks to Ms. Quek, for everything else. For the support, for the jokes, for the drinks, for the trust... tunk kyu!

INDIA - FOR BEING MY GROUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you guys rock!
Yi Long - for being the camp chief, for organising the instructors
Xavier - for being the ''discipline head'' of the camp
Orleeebiahhh - my partner in crime, i mean my partner in camp!
Peigin - for being so blur and scaring me during the night walk, for having your birthday celebrated in the camp, for being so blur
Peiqi - for organising the nightwalk with pg and serene, for trashing me in the game of ABC
Serene - for being my ''scandal-mate'', for being in my comm, for being there when Evon and I practiced for our finale song
Evon - for singing with me, for entertaining me with ur xiao za bor stance
Aini - for everything that you and I have done for each other, chestnuts rock! wahaha.
Kristine - for that 3 hours of non-stop talking that we did on the way back from Punggol Marina, for making me wish that I had such a girl-friend as you in 40/05
Stella - for piggy no.1 and piggy no. 2 :), for ka chiaoing me that i cannot touch my toes
Wenting - for letting me tell you that superman flies faster than batman
Karn - for the logistics and all, for your corny jokes, for tolerating our chinese nonsense
Yongsen - for the games and all
Kelvin - for the really great basketball games
Shannon - for the WELFARE FOOD STUFF!
Tony - for being such a great friend, for being such a great AVA MONSTER! for your corny jokes, for luffing along with me, for letting me bully!
Andrew - for the fountain stance!
Yong Wei - for ACTING as my GAY PARTNER. I'm NOT GAY! ARGH. haha.

Evon and Aini! They need to have nicer poses la. Haha. Forever so boring.

Mr. Lee and his occassional need for attention

4 girls, (from left - Evon, Aini, Stella, Wenting) staring at god knows what

Yongsen and George leaning against each other to catch 40 winks.

Stella acting strong! Hahaha

Indians - Ding Feng, Gregory and Hong Chia! Mugging lyrics on the train before their SL performance

Ms. Quek, expressionless as usual ... -.-

Not a cult, but at a deserted sandy area of Punggol. Where you can see many many stars in Singapore, for the first time

Candlelight. Let the memories burn and live.

The water bottle looks so out of place.

11 cups of bubble teas! Courtesy of Gerry and Orhleebiah!

Piggy No. 2 smiles

Piggy No.2 being herself :P

Aini and Serene! We NEVER listen to the vendors. Haha.

Kristine, the sleeping beauty.

Planta spokeswoman 2006

Give it up to the spokeswoman once again!

Hmm. The joy of parenthood. Lol. Shannon should do something about that tummy of his.

2006-05-24T19:45:00.000+08:00

Well, it's been some time since I've posted. Though I have a very important assignment due tomorrow, just wanna to upload some pictures on the recent trip to a jap restaurant near the Handle Bar. Name's Otori. Felt that the food was pretty good. :)

If you've noticed, there ain't a single picture on the food that was served because I was too busy eating. The food just kept coming. Haha. Had to work the extra calories away the next day at the basketball court.

Celebrated Chingyi's birthday yesterday at Pizza Hut. Heh, I hope she did enjoy herself. Had to get back to school for Delta games trial, and since I was early, decided to play a game of 3 on 3 with Xavier, Ernest and some other J1s. I guess the pizza went topsy turvy so much during the match that I felt like puking after that. But ah well, I didn't anyway. Hmm. Delta's getting pretty enjoyable, hopefully the friendships will last.

Ms Leong let AJ off at 1045 today! Not so bad for a new principal afterall eh? Heh.

Here's a little story that's pretty awe inspiring (sorry if you have to scroll down alot since my blogging space is so narrow :D):

Does evil exist? A university professor challenged his students with this question,"Did God create everything that exists?"A student bravely replied, "Yes, he did!""God created everything?," the professor asked."Yes, sir," the student replied.The professor answered, "If God created everything, then God created evil since evil exists, and according to the principal that our works define who we are then God is evil."The student became quiet before such an answer.The professor was quite pleased with himself and boasted to the students that he had proven once more that the Christian faith was a myth.Another student raised his hand and said, "Can I ask you a question professor?""Of course," replied the professor.The student stood up and asked, "Professor, does cold exist?""What kind of question is this? Of course it exists. Have you never been cold?"The students snickered at the young man's question.The young man replied, "In fact sir, cold does not exist. According to the laws of physics, what we consider cold is in reality the absence of heat. Everybody or object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy."Absolute zero (-460 degrees F) is the total absence of heat; all matter becomes inert and incapable of reaction at that temperature. Cold does not exist. We have created this word to describe how we feel if we have no heat."The student continued. "Professor, does darkness exist?"The professor responded, "Of course it does."The student replied, "Once again you are wrong, sir, darkness does not exist either. Darkness is in reality the absence of light. Light we can study, but not darkness. In fact we can use Newton's prism to break white light into many colors and study the various wavelengths of each color. You cannot measure darkness. A simple ray of light can break into a world of darkness and illuminate it. How can you know how dark a certain space is? You measure the amount of light present. Isn't this correct? Darkness is a term used by man to describe when there is no light present."Finally the young man asked the professor, "Sir, does evil exist?"Now uncertain, the professor responded, "Of course as I have already said. We see it every day. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world. These manifestations are nothing else but evil."To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is not like faith, or love that exist just as does light and heat. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light."The professor sat down.The young man's name --- Albert Einstein

'Tis the season to be lonely

2006-05-11T23:20:00.000+08:00

'Tis the season to be lonely...

Afraid to venture out once more. God help me face up to the past. Let me learn to love again.

Feeling more displaced than ever from the class. Finding myself trying to hang on to something comfortable, something familiar more often than ever. I admit that I've never really been an adventurous person. And this out-of-place feeling is taking a toll on me.

James Blunt - Tears and Rain

How I wish I could surrender my soul;
Shed the clothes that become my skin;
See the liar that burns within my needing.
How I wish I'd chosen darkness from cold.
How I wish I had screamed out loud,
Instead I've found no meaning.

(chorus) I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

How I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind;
Hold memory close at hand,Help me understand the years.
How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell.
How I wish I would save my soul.I'm so cold from fear.

(chorus)

stop peeking

2006-05-02T23:55:00.000+08:00

Haha, the intrusion by a certain personnel has spurred me to dedicate this entry to her. Stop peeking and start tagging, duckie!

It's really a wonder how sleep is just something coveted by the mind, a psychological source of comfort and alternative from boredom. I mean look, I was just sleepy 20 min ago due to a lack of brain activity. Now, I'm wide awake and blogging, just because I have someone to chat with! Sleep is still essential to me, nonetheless. Nothing can beat sleep as a source of escapism. Your mind wanders in an temporary impasse, with nowhere to go but within itself. The creation of the wildest begins in your sleep. The occassional fluffy sheep, the omniscient monster hiding under your bed... It's all within us, in our dreams.

Before I get all philosophical about the 'Z's, I have to say even though Delta Experience's Pre-Camp preparation is taking a toll on me, I'm still looking forward to it, I guess. Been quite some time since I've been through a camp. Definitely miss the instructor days in NP. Eh, don't pray pray sia brudders (and sisters), asst camp commandant leh! last time la.
The images of taking cadets for PT, making milo in a huge messtin while forgetting to add sugar, getting pumped in the middle of the night for a series of failed activities... They just keep rushing back into me. Haha. Ah well. That was the past.

PS: I have a boy's school pervert look?! NAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I DON'T. well i'm PRETTY sure i don't. I think. do I?!

pool

2006-04-29T19:47:00.000+08:00

It's really a pool day for me. Snooked once in the morning and another time in the afternoon. Nobody likes to play pool in my class (look. 12 girls) so...yea. Lacked quite some practice. Managed to revise a lil' on the 1st session and did pretty well for the 2nd! Haha. Okay. I admit, i'm not THAT good in pool. Just a novice.

Got a feeling that I'm eating a lot. Haha. Though I'm bballin' everyday, I'm just not used to eating normally. Gotta get used to my new diet scheme to stop my weight loss and start my muscle buildup.

Doc says that I have a bone fragment in the fractured tibia, and I gotta remove it in December! Great. 3rd operation in 3 years...

Sometimes, I just wish that things can go the way I want it to be...

She's a real beauty, so?

boo.

2006-04-20T00:38:00.000+08:00

I can never seem to get out of troubles with the opposite sex. Blame it on my insensitivity or the inability to run parallel with the wavelengths of some girls. When you give reviews of a tech object (e.g. a handphone, or an MP3 player), there are bound to be bad points about the thing which you feel obliged to point out right? YET does that mean I MUST NOT buy that product? For example, I could say that an iRiver MP3 player is better than an Apple due to the battery life, but I STILL can get an Apple (nano) because iRiver is friggin' huge RIGHT? RIGHT? Sigh. Haha. Sometimes i really wonder...

Wasted (Still going to waste) many many lessons this week and the next. Left school at 11.15 on Monday and Wednesday to scorekeep for 'A' Div Bball, ditto for the coming week. Gonna skip school for my orthopaedic appointment at SGH. My knee's been acting up more than usual these days. Sigh. My hopes of achieving silver in NAPFA is gone. Everything's ready except my for my SBJ. Lack the power to jump coz of the knees, and it's exuberantly painful when I land. Yeowch. The thought itself is bad enough.

Someone said that I'm SUPPOSED to start studying now. Really? I've been in dreamland more than ever. Ugh.

2006-04-11T20:18:00.000+08:00

Well well, I'd better start updating again in case i lose my occassional blog-readers again. Heh. Some updates about my life, can't say that it have been busy, but I seem to be able to do very little everyday. Sleeping takes up most of my after-school hours, and usually, homework's the only thing I manage (barely) to complete. Will get busier as Converse 'A' Division starts (No, I didn't get into the team to play, sadly. So i'll be an official. Not bad, at least I get a converse T-shirt. =P). NEFMQ (National Economic Fund Management Quiz) lectures and preliminaries through April and May, as well as Delta Experience Camp training (I'm an instructor / PTI (tentative)! Wahaha. *militaristic horns start to sprout from head*) from now till June. I guess that means that I can only continue with life the way it is, giving studies a little miss. Hopefully I don't lose my footing too much.

The class of 40/05 can never be un-tumultous. It's been only a year and we've been getting ourselves into so much trouble, as an entity as well as individually. Now we have our treasurer getting into (nicely put) fund management crisis. Which, in actual fact, not only affects our relationships with her, but also has an impact on future (and present, likewise) class dynamics. Hopefully the class windbreaker can be made before the holidays. Think it's cool to wear it on Delta camp.

Realised that narcissism stems from the name of a Greek by the name of Narcissist. Who, actually FELL IN LOVE with his own reflection in the water. Wth! Reminds me totally of some homo sapien or homo bimbotien by the name of Francis Phuang. Wahaha.

That's it, at least for now. Gotta prepare for a UN essay writing competition. Haven't done anything and the 1st draft's due tmr! Ugh.

Hmm...

2006-03-24T22:34:00.000+08:00

The air is especially thin at the top of the mountain.

Sch has started for 1 week and I can feel that I'm still slipping, losing control over everything. Studies, friends, you name it.

Ah well.
Maybe it was meant to be this way.

11.13pm

2006-03-13T23:13:00.000+08:00

NTU Economics and Public Policies Seminar today. Full day from 8.30am to 5pm. Had to wake up at 5.45am just to take the train with my sis to NTU. Heh. The train ride was not as bad as I thought it to be. Forced myself to read a little of Silas Marner. It wasn't supposed to be a dense reading, but I guess reading on an early Monday public holiday kinda made my mind so cloudy that I had to read some paragraphs 3 times in order to make it fathomable.

Sis took me to the EEE block, where the Lee Kwan Chian (sp) Lecture Theatre was before going back to her MPE one. The LT had around 7 screens, comfy seats, and is larger than our school auditorium! Really damn nice to sleep. Haha. Saw quite a few ex-classmates from TJ, and friends from JJ and CJ. Kinda nice, though it was really awkward and took me a little contemplation before approaching Amanda and the rest from TJ. It just feels weird...

Holidays are 3/4 gone because of the seminars. This NTU one, then there's SIMUN which stretches from thursday to saturday. Great, that means I have got to finish my homework by Wednesday...

Tired.

I can't maintain a simple conversation with another person...sucks to be me.
Whoever said i'm outspoken must be blind and deaf.

2006-03-10T17:44:00.000+08:00

Rules:
1.Bold the following words that are true about you,
2.greeen the things you wish were true,
3.add one thing true about you,
4.and then tag five more people.

I miss somebody right now.
I don't watch TV these days.
I own lots of books.
I wear glasses or contact lens.
I love to play video games.
I've tried marijuana.(it's heaven on earth!)
I've been in a threesome.
I've been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I curse sometimes.
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I'm TOTALLY smart. (honest!)
I've broken someone's bones.
I'm paranoid at sometimes.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I love sushi.
I talk really,really fast/unclear.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling.
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
I like the way i look.
I am usually pessimistic.
I have alot of mood swings.
I have a hidden talent.
I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
I have a lot of friends.
I am currently single!
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop.
Enjoy window shopping. (yes...just give me $)
I would rather shop than eat.
I don't hate anyone. I dislike them.
I'm a pretty good dancer.
I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a cell phone.
I believe in God.
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I've rejected someone before.
I have no idea what i want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I've called the cops on a friend before.
I'm not allergy to anything.
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex.
I have made a move on a friend's significant past or crush in the past.
I own the "South Park" movie.
I would die for my best friends.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
i love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and i like it.
I have dated a close friend's ex.
I am happy at this moment!
I'm obsessed with guys.
Democrat.
I am punk rockish.
I am preppy.
I study for tests most of the time. (it's A levels!)
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone i've ever met.
I can work on a car.
I love my job.
I am comfortable with who i am now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever i can.
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
Plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I'm proficient in a musical instrument.
I worked at MacDonald's restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules.
I went college out of state.
I like sausages.
I love kisses.
I fall for the wrong people.
I adore bright colours.
I can't live without black eyeliner.
I don't know why the hell i just did this stupid thing.
I usually like covers more than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes. (small stuff)
I can't whistle.
I can move my tongues in waves, much like a snakes slithers.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal i've ever written in.
I can't stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distraction.
Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood.
I wear a toe ring.
I have a tattoo.
I can't stand at LEAST one person i work with.
I am a caffeine junkie.
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
I'm an artist.I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.
I love being happy.
I am an adrenaline junkie.
i have riden an elephant.
I love chocolates and crowns!
I go to school NOT for the sake of lessons.
I can't ride a bicycle.
i have/have tried to cut myself.
i think i'm the only person crazy enough to do this at 6 in the morning without any sleep for the night.
i feel crazy.
i love tomatoes!!
i like peanut butter on bananas.
Been told "you're on fire!".
Wished to be a left-hander.
I always let opportunities slip by before regretting

Five lucky people:
1. Rasyida
2. Joleen
3. Francis
4. Pearlyn
5. --

Rest in Peace

2006-03-08T20:20:00.000+08:00

...

A friend of mine ended his life yesterday. Jumped out of his 11th floor kitchen window.
Rest in peace, Junrong. I hope that you're happier now, away from whatever that was troubling you.
Please God, welcome him with your open arms...

Amen.

animated curator

2006-03-05T16:10:00.000+08:00

Heh. Did this test. It's really cool! Though an animated curator is kinda an oxymoron =/
My Personal Dna Report

Empty

2006-03-04T00:32:00.000+08:00

Feeling empty. Hmm, being in an almost all-girl class isn't as rosy (to the cheeko-peks) as it seems to be. Not only you have to put up with the nonsense/tantrums/whinings/you-name-them of a mass of girls (seriously, it IS pretty bad as compared to a class which is sexually balanced) It's really hard to find any of those friends which you can find in secondary school, and well, it's just different, even though they're your friends.

Let's just say I'm male deprived. The problem of being relatively low-profile in school. Though I'm pretty happy to have the 38 guys during PE, makes it less lonely and everything seems to be funnier.

This emptiness within me. Who'll be there for me at the end of the day?

2006-02-24T16:11:00.000+08:00

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Gerry!

There are six towns named Gerry in the United States.
On average, women blink nearly twice as much as Gerry.
You share your birthday with Gerry.
Ancient Greeks believed earthquakes were caused by Gerry fighting underground!
The water in oceans is four times less salty than the water in Gerry!
Contrary to popular belief, Gerry is not successful at sobering up a drunk person, and in many cases he may actually increase the adverse effects of alcohol.
Originally, Gerry could not fly.
Women shoplift four times more frequently than Gerry!
California is the biggest exporter of Gerry in the world.
Japan provides over thirty percent of the world's Gerry supply.

Hahahaha :P funny!

Hungry, and alone

2006-02-21T14:56:00.000+08:00

Damn. Call me a contradicting animal or whatever you like. I hate being alone as much as being with too many people. =/

Hungry and alone at the library now, waiting for SIMUN meeting to start. Looking at the draft resolutions of my other teammates really put me off. Because the quality (and length) of mine seems to really pale in comparison to them. Oh well. I really did try my best. Really I SWEAR! *crosses fingers behind his back*

Hmm. 3 hours left.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

hmm.

2006-02-18T22:55:00.000+08:00

Current state: A lil' drunk.

Hmm. Dad is in hospital. The doctor doesn't know what's wrong with his huge patches and boils, and decided to admit him for observation. I'm getting itchy just thinking about them. Other than his skin, my dad's pretty much fine, so he's actually enjoying himself in a 'quarantine' room (to prevent a spread to others) with DVDs, HBO and loads of things to watch/read/do. Nice view from the window too. Haha. Kinda like a little cosy hotel room. I typed 'quarantine' with inverted commas because, his spots ain't infectious, and my sis and I actually lied on his bed while watching Harry Potter on HBO! It's good that my parents are in a cheery mood today. Caught mom crying ystd coz of dad's condition. Ah well. Get well soon!

Ducky smsed to ask for help. She needed a talking pink carebear for a present to her friend. Ack. And hence, I went into a carebear frenzy. Met Alan at Takashimaya, and combed Orchard and Raffles City for that bear. It got really tiring when all the toy stores you go to only either sells mute pink bears, or yakking yellow bears. Must have gone into hiding or something. Or maybe there was an unplanned depletion of pink bears due to Valentine's Day. Finally conceded defeat after our last search at Robinson's... Hopefully Ducky's luck improves when she combs Parkway tmr! =P

Headed over to CHIJMES for Francis' birthday party, held at Gatsby Bar/Restaurant. The ambience was mediocre, and even more so for the food. But oh well, it's big boy's birthday, so there's little to complain =P Happy birthday brother! Finally, you're (in 2 days) turning 18!

Kinda wanna go back the time-turner a little to fill in on the days I've left this blog devoid of entries. Hmm... Ms Williams (Now you know her full name, Jol) kinda settled everything with us, and I guess things will be fine from now on. I'm not totally sure though...It's like a pressure cooker. The lid has just been lifted up and all the compressed air is let out, so everything's all comfy and nice again. Let's wait till the pressure builds up again before we set a verdict, shall we? =/

Watched Fearless on Vday with my friend. Hmm it's not bad, though I find the part where the farmers all freeze and enjoy the blowing wind in the fields pretty amusing. Those who watched will have an idea on what i'm talking about. She Hui, Ching Yi and Rasyida made cookies for everyone. Not bad la, (better don't swell their egos :P) there's still room for improvement, girls. Gone pretty broke from buying chocolates and flowers. It was fun going around 'proposing' to Ms. Ng and Ms. Quek. Haha. Hon Chan and I raced each other to Ms. Quek's classroom and disrupted her lesson with 19. The guys of 19 said that we were buaya, while e girls thought that we were sweet when Ms. Quek told them all the girls in class got flowers. Heh. I prefer to hear the latter comment =D.

Ah well, i'm not typing straight already. Must be the alcohol. Booo. Got SIMUN meeting next Tuesday. In school, 7-9pm. And I end at 12.45. Hopefully the class wants to go out for Kbox/movie. *prays hard*

I want you in my life...

The battle ensues

2006-02-12T01:00:00.000+08:00

The battle ensues in 40/05. Friday saw me (and most of the class) through as one of the worst days ever.

1st period: Econs.
Fell asleep on the table last night, rushing my TYS. Didn't manage to complete more than 7 MCQs. Came into class, pretty unprepared. Of course, Ms. Quek didn't scold despite only 2 pple in class did their work. (Made a bet with her the day before, and I wagered at least 5 pathetic souls would do their TYS. It turned out that I lost it. Damn. Haha.) She decided to give a little 'private tutoring' for those 2 who did their stuff. I guess that made everyone, even Jessline, feel guilty for coming to class empty-handed. Oh well, at least I did manage to start a little discussion with those near me, so that they won't be too lost (especially Selina and Ching Yi).

Not so bad for a start.

2nd period: Break
Noticed Hui Ting acting strangely. Cracked jokes with me at first, but then started to ignore me throughout the whole break. I seriously have no idea what I did/said wrong. Smsed her today, and yeap. She was angry with me. Refused to explain why, and I had no choice but to drop it. =/

3rd period: Civics
Ms W came into class with her "I'm gonna squeeze you into pulp look", and I knew something was going to happen. She ordered all of us to take out a piece of foolscap and write our targets for the upcoming June Common Test and the Prelims. Okay. We did. Then she started to lash at everyone for not bringing dictionaries during GP, causing Ms. Usha to stop teaching us until she 'see(s) a change in (our) attitudes'. Some exerpts from the 'exciting' tongue-lashing:

"Who SAID YOU ALL CAN TALK BACK? YOU NEVER TALK BACK TO TEACHERS!" --->yea, except you're not a teacher but a bitch.
"YOU ALL THINK YOU'RE VERY GOOD ISSIT?! 43% OF THE CLASS IS IN APTS AND THERE IS NOT A SINGLE STRONG STUDENT!" ---> half of your APTS students are actually the most hardworking people in class. Can you stop putting them down? Can't you see you're not achieving the effect you want? Instead, you're demoralising them!!
"YOU ALL NEVER BRING DICTIONARY ON PURPOSE ISSIT?!" ---> who would be as childish as this man. But, yea it IS a good idea.

She wanted us to come up with a pageful of reflections on our supposed undesirable actions, especially during GP. Got so pissed that I only wrote "I will bring my GP things to lesson". Decided to add sacarstic remarks onto the piece of paper, and LIGHTLY cancel them out. So that she can read it nice and clear, but oh well. I CANCELLED IT. She's not a thought police and can't fault me for thoughts in my head that were transpired ACCIDENTALLY onto the piece of paper. Haha. To my amusement, I found out that Jessline did the same too. Her snide remarks were even better than mine. You go, girl. Haha. Ahh, the sweet taste of vengence.

4th period: History lecture
A hiatus from all the scoldings. =) Ms. Ng is still as fun as ever.

5th period: Lit tutorial (in case you didn't know, it's HER period again)
Okay, so everyone acted normal for the lesson, except that the sentence "YOU NEVER TALK BACK TO YOUR TEACHERS" loomed within our heads. So, we unanimously decided to not TALK during the tutorial. Come'on now, there's no offence in not answering if you don't know the answers right? Haha, and apparently she got so fed up that she left a little while later.

HOD GP came in during Ms W's absence to speak to us about the importance of GP. She failed to see the point that the issue doesn't lie in GP now, but the class dynamics between the students and a CERTAIN PD tutor. Yet, her words were so much more swallowable than that PD tutor.

6th period: History tutorial
Ms. Ng tried to comfort us for all the trauma we suffered thus far. Haha...

7th period: Lunch
Saw Rebecca and told her about my eventful day. Haha, and she quipped'HEY! That sounds exciting!'. Too bad I couldn't talk to her for long because the girls decided to look for Ms. Usha to settle our problem in GP. Turns out that Ms. Usha didn't complain to Ms W about us talking back to her. Well well, this shows Ms W's tendency to add her own arguments into pple's thoughts.

8th period: Lit lecture. (GUESS WHO)
To cut it short, she chased 2 people out of lecture, coz of her freaking bad mood. When she left the LT to rail at them, I could hear a common opinion from classes around me.
"She's always so temperamental"
"Why so inconsistent one?"
Ah. You get the idea.

Okay, so she comes back, finishes teaching, and told us to engage in discussion for the essay question. I was doing just as she instructed, and suddenly, like a sharp hot stink of a fox, turned to me and said "GERRY! you want to sleep issit? Essay finish already issit?"
What the fuck did I do? My eyes were wide open, and my head wasn't even on the table, and I was talking. How the hell can I sleep?! And here comes the good part. Her butt was facing me before she turned around to scold me. This either shows that her eyes grow on her butt, or her eyes grow on her butt.

In short, long entry, bad day. Congratulations for making it thus far. Heh.

Tired

2006-02-07T21:28:00.000+08:00

Hmm, school ended in a not-so-nice mood today for some of us, I guess. For me, it was more of our dear principal taking 1 1/2 periods to beat around a blardy big bush, to reach her point: If you got a problem, don't go to the media (inference: and tarnish the school's image). The media reporters are looking for exclusive scoops... (inference: they don't give a damn on what's happening to you. They just want N-E-W-S) and yada yada yada.

For those of you who don't know what's going on, AJ made it onto the Sunday Times as the J2 students had to go through a 4 hour long "brainwash" session on Sex Education, like I said in an aforementioned post. (go to the old blog to take a look-see if you want) This kind of created an uproar amongst some students due to religious inclinations while the programme was supposed to be secular in nature. Ah well, at least there's publicity for this dull institute...

After Mass Civics, Ms W summoned all APTS students to see her. By the looks of it before I left the classroom, she was being quite unreasonable. Not as if they didn't want to work hard, but she's sterotyping academically weak to lazy and unmotivated. I mean looks at O, H and F?! lazy? unmotivated? puleaseee they're the only hardworking people in class. Can't fathom what's with her way of dealing with her students...

Supposed to meet Melissa at 3 in Orchard. Knowing that she would be late, I slept in the library till it was almost time before taking the MRT. (oh, i borrowed Day After Tomorrow!) Yet, I was still EARLY. ugh. Never can she arrive earlier (okay, even on time) ever since I've known her. Had lunch with her, and accompanied her to do some mugging, since she needed to start studying for her imminent common test. Oh yea, one of the cashiers of the Taiwanese food stall in Lucky Plaza seems to be les. Kept asking Mel for her phone number so that they can go out together. WTH. It was really disgusting, the way she pestered her.

Ack. I really need to get my grip together. Taking things in my stride a little too much. Really need to juggle work, rest, play properly again. I guess I just need a little more time to adjust. Just a little more time...

Eve of birthday

2006-02-03T23:01:00.000+08:00

56 more minutes to my birthday! Woot.

Got a Topman wallet from the class. Wah. Very nice. Haha. Finally I can throw my mouldy wallet away. And that 猪你生日快乐 card was cute too. Thanks girls (and guy)! Selina gave me this stringed beads with my chinese name on it, and a nice star too. Thanks. Appreciate it. Haha, expecting harvest this year to be more than satisfactory. Heh. Heh. But oh well, the more important thing is that everyone arounds me stays healthy in mind, body and soul. And of course, be happy! Bwahaha

Cross-country today was real boring. Because I wasn't allowed to run. Mr. Chin allocated me at the security checkpoint. Had to check belongings in and out...so it wasn't really fun la. Haha, but it was nice laughing at dead tired people coming back from the run though =P. Oh, yea, well done to Ching Yi, who was the fastest in class. 81 out of so many girls not bad alr la. Haha. Be content, lesser mugger.

P.S: I realise that I tend to end posts rather precipitously...I dno why, just the tendency to. 45 more mins! =D

1st post!

2006-01-30T21:20:00.001+08:00

Heh. Finally got myself a new blog... It's Chinese New Year, though 3/4 of the 4 day holidays is pretty much gone by now. The 1st day of the new year was fine, went to my grandma's house as usual. It feels good to see my relatives again (and of course, it's good to see their angbaos too! :P) Haha... Yeap, at least it wasn't as boring as compared to the previous few years. Got DVDs to ease the boredom a little bit. Watched The Island, Must Love Dogs and Constantine in the afternoon. Didn't manage to stay awake for the whole of Constantine though. Must Love Dogs is pretty funny, and (luckily) not the kind of sappy love story which I had expected it to be. Didn't think much of the Island, until Hui Ting told me about the plot. Decided to give it a try by renting it at VideoEzy, and yes, it IS a very nice show. =) Scarlett Johansson is HOT. *sweats*. Haha.

You're special. You have a very special purpose in life. You've been chosen. The Island awaits you.

Ah well, and that was Sunday. Woke up this morning, and prepared to go for some basketball. Got up, and felt like fainting all of a sudden. Broke out in cold sweat. Yeowch. The feeling was really scary as I kept telling myself that I cannot faint. Luckily my parents were there to help me. Dno what happened to me, but I broke out into a fever soon after. Bleach. A busted day, just like that. Though I did manage to recover just in time for the family lunch. Took a long nap after having my medicine. Feeling much much better now, though I still get the dizzy spells occassionally.

Ah shit, tomorrow is a sure homework day. Got loads to complete. And damn, my SIMUN assignment is 3 days overdue, and I'm only 1/3 done. Gotta really stop procrastinating, especially when I tried so hard to get into the SIMUN team. Can see that Mr. Ong isn't as satisfied with me (and Qing Yi too, perhaps) as compared to the rest of the team who're from science. Ah well, like what ducky said, Arts people (especially those who do not take Maths), are a bunch of non-conformists. I guess I do find that pretty true. =X

PS: gotta recover soon for Cross-Country!